Should've Been On 2/27

      Alright, well, here we go, trying to knock out 3 in a week. It’s a little weird that it feels so strange to do so. About 10 years ago, I was writing an hour a day. Now to write three hours in a week, and I’m like: “What am I gonna say?” Although, I will say, back then, I was actually working on something, I wasn’t just documenting the mundane details of my week. I suppose, in a way, this is still an extension of that. I consider myself practicing for when that project ever gets ready for “primetime.” However, a lot of the stuff I read says that if you ever wait until you’re “ready,” you won’t make it. It seems to me, from some of those readings, that you’ll probably never feel “ready.” There technically isn’t a “ready,” you just have to go for it, and figure out the minutiae along the way. But, I feel I may be missing more than just minutiae. And, other than just the idea of getting into the habit of writing, I’m not sure if this is “helping.” I will say, however, that just last night, as I was lying in bed, trying to fall asleep, all of a sudden, I felt like I was getting glimpses into the parts I feel might be missing. I started to see where I could go with the “information” I feel that I’m getting. It made me wonder if the new ideas were able to flow in now, because I have time for them now. I know it might not seem like a lot on the outside, but I really have been mentally preoccupied for the past couple of weeks. Now I’m open. And, having nothing really going on this week, maybe my receptors are more open to receive the “new” information. I was starting to have thoughts about some of the games, and was being flooded with all of this “information,” and all I could think of was: “While I’m trying to fall asleep?”

     If this was written on 2/27, I would have told you I was excited about practice. It was the final practice before the show. We had just practiced all together for the first time a week prior, and I was looking forward to hearing how it sounded after we had time to think about it. I would have mentioned a strange thing that occurred the week before. I guess it would have been two weeks ago. This is getting confusing now. If this were written last week, I’m referring to an event that happened two weeks ago. I’m sure of it now. I would have told you, to make it more clear, that on the 13^th, Jim, the guy we were working on this project with, had made a curious disclaimer. Wait! I need to go back a little bit further, to set the scene. Sorry this is so disjointed, but hey, this is what happens. To set the scene: For the show on Mar 2, we were originally going to play 5 songs: A jam, 2 covers, and 2 Miller originals. We jammed great, I was not concerned about that. Jim took one cover, and Wagz took the other. They were both coming along very well. So well so, that we added another cover that Wagz sings. I wasn’t sure when we started who was going to be handling the originals. Wagz and Jim have been friends a while, and Wagz had told me that Jim was taking the part of Miller, so we would just do our “normal” thing. Our first practice Jim knew one of the originals, but not the other. We played the original recording through the PA, and were able to practice to it. After that, I asked if he needed me to take the other original. He said “no,” that he had been busy, and would be more focused for the following week. He never played either of the 2 originals before, so I thought it may have been a lot.

     I started practicing the second original, just in case. So, this brings us to the 13^th: He still didn’t know it! I was like okay, let me give it a try. I had been working with it a little, but thought I could squeak by. I had to look at the words while playing, which was its own special challenge, but I survived. At that time, Jim told me that if he didn’t have the song ready by the 20^th, he would pay for the entire practice. That’s $53! I told him not to be silly, but he said: “just watch.” I wasn’t sure what to think, so I practiced the song anyway. Now that brings us to the 20^th. Come the night of the 20^th, he was not ready. It seemed clear that he had spent a little time on it, but was in no way “ready.” I had been working with it, and when I took my turn, the other bandmates said that I had a more clear vision, and said that they thought I should take that song. It felt good. I put work in. At the end of that practice, Jim mentioned he said he would pay. I was glad he remembered, and brought it up, but I couldn’t do that to him. I said he didn’t have to, and thanked him for offering. So, it was my song now. I worked all last week on memorizing it. I had never sang it before. It had been 15 years since we played it regularly. I had all my bass parts down, but I wanted to do the song justice, and play it “right.” I didn’t want to have my notes, I wanted to “know” it. I wanted for people to hear it and think it was good, and that I knew what I was doing. So, I worked on it for two weeks! And, if this was written on 2/27, I would have told you that I thought I was ready, and was going for it “off book,” tonight!