The "Alone Time" Experiment

It's finally here, the weekend I look forward to all year, Oktoberfest! Supposedly the celebration here in La Mesa is not very “authentic,” but I don't care, I still love it. For one weekend people come here, to have a good time. For us it is kind of like a little reunion. There are some people who we only see for Oktoberfest. Susan's phone started getting blown up yesterday. Everyone's wondering about which day to hang out. It's going to be crazy! We are literally right in the middle of the action, so our lives are altered a bit this weekend. But this is the first time I have the whole weekend off. Well, I guess that's not necessarily true. There was probably a time or two in the late 90's when I had the whole weekend off, but I didn't live this close. This should be fun. I was actually supposed to work tomorrow, but the retail gods shined on me. One of the girls I work with is living in some kind of sober living home, or something like that, and she's basically on lock down if she's not going to work. She needed Wednesday off, and wanted to take my Saturday shift, so she had something to do. Band practice got cancelled for Wednesday, so I jumped at the chance. It was like everything lined up just right to have this happen. Now I've got a full three days off! I need it too. I just worked six straight days in a row! I have not done that in a long time. I'm sure it might not sound that dramatic to you, but to me it's a big deal. Susan pulls a six day week often, so I can't really complain. She's so hardcore.

Although, I do have to say, she didn't do so well with the “Alone Time” experiment. By the time I got home last Saturday she was already plastered. She was unconscious by 7:30. As soon as she got off from her Saturday job, she started hanging out with friends. Which unfortunately lead to me spending my Saturday night by myself. I was more than a little bummed. Saturday night is our night, I had a dinner planned, and some special beverages, and I came home to a drooling buffoon. Not fun. Sunday wasn't any better. As soon as I left for work, she was picked up by her friends to start their day. So what was, I thought, going to be a time for her to have some down time, turned into a weekend full of “get togethers.” It's a bit disappointing to me. I really truly believe what I said about it being important for ourselves to spend time alone with ourselves. It is more to me than just an idea, I feel that I know we need that time. And she knows how I feel, but still avoids “Alone Time” at all costs. It's frustrating. It's also kind of annoying because I've started noticing that Stella Mae is kind of the same way. If I can't even get my own family to understand and appreciate “Alone Time,” how am I ever going to be able to convince other people that it's important? We have this concept we keep in mind of a “Practice Family,” as in a family that practices. Teams practice, Bands practice, Artists practice, so we practice. It gives us a foundation to work on our lives together.

Working on things together gives us the tools to use out in the “real” world. But the concept also involves being able to “try things out.” At least it's supposed to. And I will say that for the most part, the things I try to implement, are well received. I'm only trying to make us better, our lives more efficient, our ability to adapt more acute. I will also say, and I think they'd agree, that for the most part my implementations do help, and we are getting better, more efficient, and more adaptable. We are kicking butt! Stella Mae just got a personal invitation to join a Touring Choir. They're going to go to England and Scotland, traveling and singing. It's quite an honor to be asked to join as a Freshman. But she has such maturity, and such a good voice, that the director is even offering to pay a little of the cost for us. I have to believe that our “Practice Family” is a big part of the reason she has so much maturity and confidence. I have to believe that this concept is working. I also have to believe that we will be even better when we all have time to appreciate “Our Time.” Six days with no “Alone Time” for me has almost been torture. I had to rearrange my schedule, hurry and do laundry after work. No down time kept me from knowing what day it was! And, unfortunately, because of the weekend that it is, my day off is now full of things to do, that I didn't make time for earlier in the week. But you know what? Once it's done, I'll be able sit back and have a good time, basking in the joy of being around others.

Daughn