New Representation

      Staring at a blank screen, wondering where to begin. That’s usually how this starts. There are times when it is “ready, set, go,” but more often than not, it is a wonder. I feel compelled to start with the pope dying. Although I don’t really have anything to say about it. It happened. I have no attachment to him. He’s just another person as far as I care. But, especially because it keeps getting mentioned, it is noticeable. Almost 200,000 people going to see a dead body! That’s a lot. He was old, most people don’t really even seem that sad, they’re just going out of respect. That’s a long way to go to show respect! Now we’ll be hearing about the Conclave for the next few weeks. It seems like such a big deal, especially for a world that doesn’t really seem very holy. To each their own though, I guess. Other than people I personally know, I can’t imagine wanting to go see someone’s dead body. Especially if that involved waiting for thousands of people to go first. Hours in line, just to see the vessel of a spirit no longer on Earth?! No thank you. That seems preposterous to me. I bet the vendors in Rome are getting an economic boost. I hate to sound so cynical, but all the pomp and circumstance make it seem like a show. And, to me, it is just a show. “Look at all these grieving people!” I find it interesting that “people” “elect” “God’s representative.” Just a show. Not having a representative will somehow enact a dynamic on their spirituality? That blows me away. I think people believing that they need some kind of conduit between them and God, is one of the biggest blights on the whole idea. How can a person be convinced that someone other than themself, should be their representative to God? It’s all about power, control, and sheep. Most people don’t want to represent themselves. It alleviates the burden of self-decisions. But, it also lines the pockets of those in control.

     Wow, four months in, and this is already the third memorial post. What a year! Although, I did hear recently that the woman I wrote you about a week or so ago, did not OD. Apparently according to sources much closer to her, it was pneumonia. I guess the person who told me about the OD did not have a clue what he was talking about. I will be more cautious when I get information from him, in the future. I guess that’s the way it has to work sometimes. Sometimes people lie, but other times, people think they know something that they don’t actually know. I don’t know if that’s really a “lie.” It definitely shouldn’t be spread, but it’s not through evil intent. I know I’ve gotten facts from him before, that initially seemed suspicious, then found out it was true. So, I don’t consider him a liar, but will continue to question whether what I’m hearing from him is true. For example, and this may be a little tough to do succinctly: A mutual friend of ours, Rich, used to work for Grand Ole Barbeque. (A great place to go, if you’ve never been) (Well, it’s great, even if you have been) I heard from 2 Calvins that he no longer worked there. I was not sure if they knew what they were talking about. Wagz has been friends with Rich, and GOB’s owner Andy, since they were kids. So, at practice, I asked Wagz if he had heard. He had not. That made me suspicious of the information. Especially since Wagz told me that he had just seen Rich. Then, last Friday, when I was practicing with the newest project, I’m calling New Chune, the drummer, who also works for GOB, said that Rich was fired! I found it interesting that Lance, who started New Chune, didn’t know either. They’ve all been friends forever. It was also of interest to me that this information came about unprovoked, he just happened to mention it on break.  

     So, just to wrap it all up: When Wagz hadn’t heard about Rich, I assumed the information was false. Then, a week later, I found out the information was true, and got the rest of the information I was hoping to get from Wagz. And, all without provocation. I love when stuff like that happens! It really makes me feel connected to the Universe. And all without the need for a “representative.” Practice went great, by the way. It was the first time we played electric, and it was the first time we played with a drummer. It made a huge difference. Although, it did make it a little more difficult to recognize the songs. But I figured, I had heard them twice, and the drummer hadn’t heard them at all, so we were about even. I had never played with a drummer who was so laid back. It was interesting. He had made a few comments about how I was “on top of it.” I decided not to let him know I had no idea what was going on. I still can’t tell one song from the next, and adding electric instruments, with new sounds, and drums, wasn’t helping. However, it was fun, and it did sound cool. Upon listening back to practice, I started to get the sense of what it could become. In the moment I’m just trying to “keep up,” but I’m starting to see where we might be going. Lance is not really the type of musician to break down what the parts are, or where the changes go. It’s a little more loose than what I’m used to, but this is about trying new things, and it’s happening. And it’s cool. And it may melt faces. Saturday was a little weird. I went to a show by myself. Susan was with her friend at a resort for a birthday party, and two of my favorite bands were playing the Ken Club, so I went alone. I almost never do that. I was approached by a lot of people, mostly about the Calvins, but also about what I have going on. It seemed like perhaps, because I wasn’t with anyone, it made me more available for random conversations. I didn’t mind. It felt good, the show was awesome, and I achieved what I wanted to.

Doing While You Can

      Halfway through April, and it still feels like the year just started. I must be having fun. Although it doesn’t always feel like it. Today they shut off our water to fix some kind of local leak. We got no warning. I had just started laundry. I finished breakfast, and went to rinse my utensils, when I noticed there was no water. I checked the faucet in the bathroom: nothing. Then I went and turned off the washing machine. I don’t know what happens if you run it with no water, and I don’t want to know. I know it filled up at least once, because the clothes were wet. I think I stopped it just before the second cycle started. Which, if it had to happen, was probably the best time to catch it. I consider that a blessing. Another interesting thing that happened was: I picked up my phone to text my wife, to ask if she had heard about the water being shut off. As soon as I touched my phone, I received a text from her stating that she had just got a notification of the water being shut off. Talk about being on the same page! I love when little things like that happen. It makes it hard to be bummed when you realize that there is a universal connection, and things could have been much worse. Two timing connections within a minute of each other?! How could I not feel connected? It was hard to remember not to flush the toilet, and I had to keep reminding myself why I hadn’t brushed my teeth yet, but other than that, it was just a minor inconvenience. The water has come back on, laundry has been restarted, and my teeth have been brushed, all just a little later than desired. I’m hoping I can get this done before the dryer finishes. I hate getting distracted from this, but I also hate the idea of clean, warm clothes just sitting in the dryer wrinkling. But, I’d much rather remember where I was, than let clothes wrinkle.

     I think I may have a new neighbor. The past couple of days, I’ve been hearing loud music blaring. I thought I was the only one! No, but seriously, the other night we both heard it, and were looking at each other like: What the Fuck!? I heard it the other afternoon, and tried to inconspicuously look to see what it was, and the only thing I could see was a neighbor seemingly cleaning out his truck. He’s an older person, almost elderly. We’ve talked a few times, he’s been here since before we moved in. Taking his age into consideration, and the fact that I have not witnessed this behavior in the 5 years we’ve lived here, I assumed it wasn’t him. But, today, just as I sat down to write this, I heard it again. And, once again, all I can see is his little red truck opened all the way up, again! This time, I decided to stick my head out, and sure enough there is thrash metal coming out of the little red truck. A couple of things caught my attention. 1) This is the 2^nd or 3^rd time this week this truck needs cleaned out? Doors fully open, and I don’t really see anything going on. That’s weird. 2) I can not imagine the guy I know listening to that kind of music. If I’m like: What is all this racket? Then there’s a problem. He’s a few doors down from us, I can’t imagine what his close neighbors must be putting up with. Did he just start listening to thrash metal? Maybe he’d like the Calvins. We’re not thrash, but it’s loud and fast. 3) Since I haven’t seen anyone with the truck, I don’t know if he has a visitor. It can’t be a detailer. Why would it need detailed more than once in a week? Well, that concludes our “weird things going on around my neighborhood” segment. Now we can get into the usual stuff that keeps us connected.

     No practice tonight. Wagz and his family went to visit New York, and Washington D.C. He seemed pretty excited. I guess he’s never gone and done the touristy thing, so he didn’t want to wait anymore. I get it. His kid is getting older, and there won’t be too many opportunities left. Ever since our friend died, he’s really been on a “might as well do it now” trip. Which I also get. As we age it becomes increasingly clear that we don’t have much time left, our mortality is sitting there dangling in front of us like a carrot, egging us on to get more done, while we still can. I couldn’t help but think about it this past Sunday. We went to a memorial show for a “friend.” This lady passed away. She was at a lot of the punk rock shows we were at. We had seen her several times. I always thought she seemed very interesting. I imagined we would someday actually meet, and be like minded. She had her own style, she seemed like an artist. I was looking forward to getting to know her. However, I didn’t even know her name until I got invited to her celebration of life. She has the same name as one of our good friends: Andrea. They both go by Andi. There were a lot of cool punk bands playing. Two of my favorites. It was also a fundraiser, to help her friends with her final expenses. It was kind of sad. She wasn’t even 33 yet! I had no idea. Apparently, she OD’d, something else I had no idea about. They had a video montage playing, with photos of her. She seemed to have had an interesting life. The photos made me more sad. I felt like we missed an opportunity. And now she’s gone. I’ve been thinking about it all week. Hopefully, now, it’s run its course. The show was cool. I could not believe how many people were there. It was packed! And her best friend said, on the mic: She would never have believed that this many people would show up for her. Another reason to do while you can.

Making A Scene

      I was going to wait until tomorrow, so this could be on 4/11, but since I don’t feel I have that much information, I thought it would be inappropriate. Well, I guess for starters: my bracket is officially busted. We came in fourth. We were almost second, but that fell through. It doesn’t really matter much, because in our group, winner takes all, and we weren’t going to win. Oh well, it’s fun. Something to pay attention to, and hope for. I’m glad it’s over. That’s a lot of basketball watching for me. I don’t usually watch. I’ll occasionally watch the Aztecs, if nothing else is on, but in general, except for the Tournament, I don’t watch basketball. Or baseball. I’ll occasionally check the Padres score, I like knowing what’s happening, I just don’t like to watch. Any time I do watch, the only thing I find interesting are the stats. The game itself, doesn’t hold much interest for me. It’s weird because I know people who are very involved. Zop, the singer for the Calvins, is checking the score the entire time we’re at practice. Well, not while we’re playing, but, every break. I can’t imagine caring that much. Almost about anything. I don’t even check to see if I missed a call. Or text. I figure: I’m at practice, that’s what I’m doing. Anything else can wait. At Eruption practice, which is happening tonight, we never check our phones. The keyboard player checks the basketball scores on break, but that’s about it. Kevin, the guitar player for the Calvins, has to check his work phone constantly. I kind of feel bad for him. He’s some kind of manager, and he never hangs up in a good mood. I find it interesting that we, or at least I, still say: Hang Up. We don’t really “hang it up” anymore, do we? Should we switch it to “disconnect?” These are the kinds of things that keep me up at night. Although, “disconnecting” doesn’t give the same satisfaction when you’re pissed, and want them to know.

     This past weekend went swimmingly. We got to the Bancroft around 5. We caught the last couple of songs by Hamapple. They’re from Long Beach. They’re pretty good. We played with them at Punks & Brews a couple of years ago. I like them. I was a little bummed that I missed most of their show, but I was glad I caught some. The band I was most stoked about was Carpit. Also from Long Beach. There were a lot of bands there that day from Long Beach. I’m not sure about the connection. But, I was stoked to see Carpit. I wasn’t sure if we were going to get to, since we had to bail early. I didn’t hear anything about the lineup before going, so we weren’t sure. It just happened to work out in our favor. We got to see the last bit of Hamapple, then our good friends Deadly Dispute, and Carpit came on right after that. It couldn’t have worked out better. There was a good amount of people there. It wasn’t packed, but there were people. I’ve come to the determination that it’s hard to pack a place for local punk bands. Also, and especially, if it’s a long show. If you have bands from 2 until 10, it will not be packed for 8 hours. I don’t even know if they expect it to be. It seemed like the bulk of the people were there while we were. We left around 7:30, and it was already pretty thin. I don’t know if people were planning on getting there later. I saw some videos, and it looked pretty bleak. But, most of the videos are from the pit. And, as much as it may hurt some to hear: Not everyone wants to be in the pit. Some of us like to keep ourselves safe, and enjoy the show without fear of bodily harm, spilled beverages, or constantly being touched. (Eruption drummer just texted he’s out for tonight, bummer)

     At first, it seemed like we got to the Tower Bar way too early. We got there around 8, and it was dismal. The band was setting up, and there may have been 5 other people. I saw a couple of people we knew, and said “hello.” (I just had to turn the fan on. It’s 85 here!) We were instantly drawn into a conversation by people we didn’t know. They saw we ordered Pacificos, and commented on the tariffs. They were friendly. Well, I guess I’d have to say she was friendly. I don’t remember the guy saying anything. I wasn’t even sure they were together until they left. Which was almost directly after our conversation. Then there were 3. Then a friend walked in. We’ve known him for years. He’s more of a “friend of a friend.” He’s really tight with our old neighbor. But, this was the first time we’ve actually had a conversation. I knew he was kind of big into the local punk scene, but this was only the second or third time I saw him at a show. We had a pretty good conversation. He said he was glad we were there, or he might have been bored out of his mind. I took that as a compliment. I felt the same way. Being there too early gave us the opportunity to speak, so it worked out. The place never got very packed. We got to see our friends from Oceanside, so that was cool. They killed it, as always. We got to talk to them a little bit. That night, the show was for someone’s bachelor party, and they seemed genuinely shocked to hear us tell them we were there to see them, and could give 2 shits about the bachelor party. It’s nice to have fans. I guess. The show was awesome. We stayed a little longer than we had planned on, but it was cool. It was tricky, but we got to both shows! Yay!

Staying In The Scene

      Happy new month! I know it’s been a couple of days, but it’s still new to me. And it felt fitting, considering this is the first one of this month. I’m excited, this will be my third practice this week. Although, tonight is JoZ, instead of Eruption, I’m still glad to get to play. I thought it was funny, last week, after Eruption practice, our drummer informed us that he would not be available tonight. Once he left, and we were going over each other’s schedules, I asked the other two if they wanted to do JoZ this week, since the three of us were still available. Wagz said: “Oh, that’s right, I forgot about JoZ.” It hasn’t been that long. And, he’s the one, who just a little while ago, suggested that JoZ might be ready for their own show. That seemed odd to me. But, when I asked earlier this week, if we were still on for tonight, I got two yeses. Also, just to sum up last Thursday, we killed it! We’ve been working on these three new songs for quite a while. They’d be shocked if they actually knew how old they were. But, no one has heard them, so they’re still “new.” We haven’t worked on them in a while. E, our drummer, was hurt for almost a year. Then, we were getting ready for a show. After that we were working on the Miller’s Dairy stuff. So, it has been a while. Much to my great pleasure, it was like no time had passed. I couldn’t believe it! They sounded better than they ever had. I was so happy. Especially the next day, when I checked the rehearsal recording, and it sounded as good as I thought it did the night before. We try to get the mix the same every time, but it’s almost impossible. This was the best we ever sounded, in the rehearsal space. We played and sounded awesome! It was a great relief. I guess sometimes, leaving things on the back burner can let them marinate into maturation.

     Last Saturday, my wife and I went to see our friend’s band at the Ken Club. It was Inciting Riots’ last show. One of the guitar players is moving, and I guess the rest don’t want to deal with having to find a new one. I get it. After 25 years, no one really “wants” to do that. They’d already cut back on gigging quite a bit. However, they did just record an album. So, we were all caught a little off guard when they announced they were hanging it up. There was another show I wanted to go to that night also. This band I really like called Spider were playing the Tower Bar, but I couldn’t make both. I didn’t realize until FB told me I had replied “going” to 2 shows the same night. I had to make a decision, and a friend’s farewell show takes precedence over someone I can see in 2 weeks every time. That’s one of the things now, so many things going on, on the same day. Last Saturday there were two shows, this Saturday there are two shows, it’s becoming crazy. Especially because, as I was at the Inciting Riots show, I kept wondering where everyone was at. My wife kept telling me: “This is everyone.” There were people there, don’t get me wrong. But it felt to me like there should have been more. These guys have been a big part of the scene for a long time. It made me wonder how attendance was at the Tower Bar. And, as I scanned through social media, in the days after, I saw a lot of posts about the Ken Club show. Many videos were shared. I have yet to see one single video, or photo, of what happened at the Tower Bar that night. It makes me wonder, because I did see a lot of people at the Ken. People I hadn’t seen in years. The most popular question of the night: “When are the Calvins playing again.” It felt good, but at the same time, I don’t like telling the same story over and over.

     Sometimes I feel like I’m the only one trying to keep the Calvins in the scene. They really don’t care. I can’t even get them to go to a show, let alone play one. I don’t understand why they’re not chomping at the bit. And, the more I kept telling the “story,” the more I realized I pretty much always refer to the Calvins as “they.” We’re definitely masculine, and that may have been the only statement in which I refer to myself as part of “them.” At practice, I always say “we.” But outside of that, it’s always: “They” don’t like to play too many shows. “They” don’t like to gig when we’re writing. I think it might make people wonder why I say it like that. However, being in multiple bands, there needs to be a way to differentiate them in your head. And, it may come out sounding funny sometimes. Especially when, I’m answering for people that I don’t necessarily think like. I would play more often. I think we can write and gig. Our gig is only 30 minutes! We can rehearse and then still have 2 hours to “write.” So, I guess I feel, when I’m giving someone else’s answer, it is “they.” Who ever thought “they” would be such a confusing word. Oh well, I’m not getting into that right now. This Saturday I’m trying to make both shows. In the afternoon on Saturday, it’s the Whatever68 Radio’s 13^th anniversary show at the Bancroft. We got to play last year, and were asked to play this year but “they” said “no.” A band I really like called Carpit are playing. They’re from Long Beach, so I don’t get to see them very often. Plus, I want to make an appearance, to stay in the mind of the scenesters. Then, another band I really like called Gentroside are playing the Tower Bar later that night. They are from Oceanside, so I don’t get to see them very much either. See what I mean!? So, I’m going to attempt to see two shows on Saturday, afternoon, and evening. Wish me luck!