Spending Time With Others

      It’s funny the way things work out sometimes. I know it’s not always easy to laugh at, but usually, in hindsight, it is funny. Last week we went to a local joint called East Bound Bar & Grill for my wife’s work gathering. It was fun. I got to meet a lot of her work friends, and I was right, there were a lot of questions. It was quite a bit different from last year. Last year her work paid for us all to go to a Padre game. It was cool, they had rented a patio, and had some food and drinks available. The part that was different for me was that last year there was almost no interaction between us and other people. My wife had said hello to a few people, but it was almost like we were strangers. Well, I was one. She was fairly new, and the company is kind of big, so now I realize that it’s not likely to know people outside your department. Plus, now that we’ve been to 2 Padre outings, and 2 Holiday parties, I also realize that people don’t generally associate with people outside their department. I imagine that the idea of having all, or most, of your employee family together under one roof, is to have them mingle. Perhaps putting a face to that name on the email list you always see, but haven’t yet met. Perhaps finally meeting that person you see in the hallway, but haven’t yet had the time, or privilege, to meet. However, in my experience, that is not usually the case. And has not been the case in my last 3 meetings with this group of people. Then again, they are, kind of, nerds. It’s an accounting firm. As far as I know, accountants aren’t really known for their outgoing personalities. So, I guess it should make sense. I’m not that outgoing either, so when a bunch of non-outgoing people get together, it’s not likely to rage.

     This event was a bit different. My wife has been there for a while now. I got to meet a lot of the people she sees, and talks to, on a regular basis. I got a chance to put a face to some of the names I have heard her talk about. There were a lot of curious people, and the was a lot more interaction than there was in any of the previous events. Strangely enough, no one from her team were there, but it didn’t seem to make any difference. We had fun. The company had rented the entire patio. I never even knew they had a patio like that. The event itself was pretty cool. They had a very nice spread, and a list of drinks that we could have for free. In my younger days, I would have tried to work the system, but since it was a work function, and I’m a much older responsible person now, I decided to be “good.” Towards the end, it had the feeling of: “about to get out of control.” Shots started being busted out, when most of the people with families had left. That’s when we decided to take our leave also, as to not get “sucked in.” They all had the next day off, and a lot of people decided not to bring their young families, perpetuating the idea that they were there to “party.” We put our emphasis on making sure we made it home safely. The Padres won! We are, so far, 2 for 2 watching the Padres this year.  Tatis Jr. didn’t do much, but we won, so that’s all that matters. It’s interesting how much more attention gets paid when the team is doing good. It’s exciting. I’m not sure how fun it would be to sit around with your friends, talking about how bad the team you like is. That doesn’t sound exciting. This is the first time in a long time that the Padres are actually doing well, so it kind of feels new to me, being around so many fans.

      We did go see All Monster Revue on Friday. They were good. I was actually surprised. We have met the singer a few times, but this was the first time we got to see her perform. She was good. I was impressed. The band was good too. Very tight. But it was a little kitschy. They all dress up in costume, and sing a lot of songs about Halloween. It seemed a bit odd for the middle of April, but it was good. I was glad we saw them. We may see them again. The show itself however, not so good. At most, there may have been 30 people there. Never at the same time. The first band was horrible. Not only do I not remember their name, but I wouldn’t put it on here, as to not defame them. If you’re interested DM me. It was awful. The next band turned out to be a band I had been wanting to see for a while. They’re called 13 Wolves. I had heard a lot about them, and was glad I was finally going to get to see them. I know the bass player, but it just never worked out that I got to see them. It was just okay. The lead singer had a good presence, and for the most part the band played well, but it wasn’t anything I’d want to see again. They all dressed up like werewolves, and the singer could not be understood, because he had to sing through the mask, which he did effortlessly, but still, I didn’t loose myself. They didn’t have much of a crowd, which confused me, because I had heard so much about them. Overall, I was glad my bandmates had not attended. I saw who I needed to see, and represented, objective met! I did not go with them Saturday night, which sounded like a benefit. They said the venue sucked, and they walked out because they could barely hear anything but the drums and guitar. They were bummed, I was not.

Seeking Shade

      Happy 420! I’m not really into the whole thing myself, but I do recognize when it comes around. It’s hard not to, as I have a lot of “friends” who are, and practically treat it like a holiday. I’ve gotten to the point where I really only smoke at bedtime. I have no desire to go through my regular life without my brain on. I will probably have a few extra puffs tonight, especially since my wife doesn’t have to work tomorrow. Tonight is kind of like a Friday. It’s kind of cool, for some reason her work decided to give the employees an extra paid day off during the year, and it just happens to be tomorrow! What’s also cool is that they’re having a watch party tonight for the Padres. It should be fun. Everyone is so excited about the return of Tatis Jr. I’m not sure one person can make that big of a difference, but hey, if it gets people excited, it’s exciting. I hope he’s able to pull something off. I do understand it to be true that excitement can cause things to happen. I also understand that if a person creates a bit of momentum, it can be carried on to those around them. So, I have hope, although I feel that the Padres will probably play the way they’ve been playing, which, in case you don’t know, is so-so. Who knows, maybe he is the spark. We got to go see a game last weekend. It was our friend Ryan’s birthday, and what he wanted, was for a bunch of his friends to go to a game together. So, we did. It was fun. A couple of our friends got to the tailgate park early, so we had a place to post up. I didn’t realize that there would be no place down there to buy beer, so we tailgated sober. Which was fine. I was still trying to recover from the night before. Water was more in alignment with my needs at the time. Some people were already quite inebriated.

     I guess the bulk of the crew got there around 11am. That was a little too early for me. We took the trolley, and got there near noon. I wasn’t sure about the shade situation, and didn’t want to spend the entirety of the day in the sun. Good thing we did, our seats were in direct sun. Luckily, in the parking lot they had a pop-up shade, so I was able to get out of the sun. We had pretty good seats, they were just in direct sun, so I was a little nervous. I had put on a good amount of sunscreen, so I just rolled with it. I made it about 5 innings before I had to seek shade. We got a chance to walk around and see what had changed. We hadn’t been to the park in 3 years, so it’s always fun to check out the new stuff. One of our friends, from a different friend group, actually owns one of the restaurants there. It was cool to see his place, and see the line waiting to get his food. It was new since the pandemic, so it was our first time getting to see it. It was cool. By the time we were done walking around, and eating, we got another beer and went back to our seats. It was right about the 7^th inning and the seats were finally in the shade, so we were good for the rest of the game. We won that game! Everyone was obviously very excited. It was interesting that when we got back to our seats, the whole area was full of people. We had like 30 people, and I apparently hadn’t seen all of them. I guess a lot of people were avoiding the sun for most of the game, and only came to the seats when there was shade. People said I was red, but I am happy to admit that I did not get sunburned. I must have lathered myself up appropriately.

     Tomorrow night my wife and I are going to see a band at the Ken Club. They’re called All Monster Revue. I checked them out online, and it’s okay. Not really our style, but the singer has been to see my punk band, The Calvins, like 3 times, and I feel like we should reciprocate. They had actually asked us to play the show with them, but my bandmates were not into it. They are also not interested in going to see them. However, they do want to go see a different band on Saturday night. I’m not sure I want to attend 3 social events in a row. The band on Saturday night is the new band of the guy who used to be the drummer for Fluf. Apparently, he wants to play with us, and they want to see what he’s all about. I feel that my bandmates think he’s “cooler” than the band I’m going to see, and possibly a chance at better gigs. I guess it’s better if we divide and conquer. More schmooze that way. I see it as kind of the same thing, but when I asked if they wanted to go see the band I’m going to see, they practically scoffed. Oh well, the more Calvins sightings the better. We are getting a lot of shows right now. So many shows that we’re turning shows down. I never thought I’d be in that situation, but like I was saying earlier, when momentum gets going, it gets passed around. Kind of like a joint! Sorry, I probably wouldn’t have put that in if it weren’t 420, and I wasn’t watching a documentary on the history of the “weed movement.” But hey, that’s what happened. Or is happening? I’m not sure about the tense there, but I’ll leave it at that. Maybe it is weird to go see a band just to reciprocate. It’s nice, yeah, but would it make more sense to go see a band whose music I’d actually like?  I’m sticking with the more sightings the better.

A Nice Peaceful Celebration

      I’m excited I get to have Eruption practice tonight. Eruption is the band I have to this point referred to as my “prog” band. I figure on my way towards being more detailed, things like this should be better known. I’m excited because it’s been almost a month, but I’m also uncertain because I got a cryptic text from our drummer this morning. The text said that his wife was not feeling well, and that he may have to skip practice to take care of their girls. That was 6 hours ago, and I still have no idea if he’s going to make it or not. I’m kind of on the fence about letting the other guys know. The studio we use to practice takes payment the day before we rehearse. So, if we want to cancel, we need to cancel 24 hours in advance or we have to pay anyway. I get it, they want to make sure they have the chance to get the room rented. But no one wants to spend $45 on nothing. Hence, I prefer knowing we’re not practicing more than 24 hours ahead of time. I know things happen, and some of them are out of our control. The guys are usually pretty good at helping me out when we have to pay for nothing. It’s attached to my card, so I’d be stuck with the bill by myself. That’s part of the risk I take, but it’s good to have a good bunch of guys, so I don’t get screwed. The reason I’m comfortable not telling the others is that: 1) At this point, I don’t know that there’s anything to say. I still don’t know anything other than that the drummer might not be there. 2) As may be evident by this point, this has happened before. It actually happens so often that the rest of us have kind of created another band we call JoZ, so we can still use the room, and have fun. We play to a drum machine, and just kind of make up wacky stuff. It’s fun.

     I don’t really have any fear that the rest would cancel if we had no drummer, so I’m not sure a text is even necessary. I’ll wait until I know something. That makes more sense. Either way, I’m excited. We have a show coming up at the end of June, so we have plenty of time to get ready. I know I’m out next week. So, we have to take what we can get. Next week my wife’s company has rented out a local restaurant, so all the employees can watch the Padres game together. I know she wants to go. And it’s a bring your family type thing, so I know she wants us to be there. She said she would be fine by herself, but I know she wants me to go. I guess I’ll have fun too. I realize that these bonding events are necessary, and important. Plus, my wife still doesn’t have her license back yet, so she’d have to Lyft. Not that big of a deal, but if I can help, and save us a few bucks, I’ll do it. For some reason they’re all getting the next day off, so it could be a party. She’s so happy to be involved with a company that does these kinds of things, that it would have to be something pretty severe for me to bail on her. Plus, the place is pretty cool, and it’s very close to us. It’s called the Eastbound Bar & Grill. We’ve been there a few times, it’s got a cool vibe and good food. My wife just got “Employee Spotlight of the Month,” so she’ll probably be meeting all kinds of new fellow employees. She said she was overwhelmed by how many new faces she’s met since the newsletter came out. She’s pretty excited. She’s glad to be recognized. I’m happy for her. In her write-up she talked a lot about our family, so I might be getting a lot of extra attention too.

     Easter was good. We would normally have it at my Mother-in-law’s house, but she’s having some major restroom renovations being done, so it wasn’t going to work. The whole front of her house is in shambles, including parts of the kitchen. She’s got a huge house, and loves having it full of people, so it’s usually our go to spot for the holidays. My parents are now always invited, so it’s like one big happy family. I think everyone is glad we all have that type of relationship. Knowing that our usual spot was unavailable, I asked my parents if they were comfortable hosting. They were happy to. I guess we could have had it at our home, but it’s not that big, and we may have not all had enough room to feel comfortable. We don’t have an extra table, so that limits our guest count. I don’t think we plan on getting an extra table either. We can host a few people, and that’s all we really need. I’m not really a “house full of people” kind of guy. My house was never the house that “everyone hung out at.” My wife and I went over to my parent’s house Saturday night, that way we could wake up there Easter morning. We have a traditional breakfast we usually do, so it’s nice to not have to wake up extra early and drive over there. Plus, it gives us a little extra time to socialize with each other. Even though my parents only live 7 miles from us, we still don’t see them that often. Or talk to them very much for that matter. I think about it. Especially since my Father-in-law died. I know my turn is coming, and I don’t want to be sitting around thinking I should have spent more time with them. So, we soak it up when we can. Easter dinner was great. My Mother-in-law and her boyfriend were able to come, and it was a nice peaceful celebration.

Wondering If It's Worth It

      Good Friday! I specifically waited for today so I could tell you about the comedy show last night. It was fun. It went well. We knew it was a bit of a drive, and weren’t too sure about how bad traffic would be, so we left early. Traffic turned out to not be an issue. It still took us 45 minutes to get there, but the drive was smooth. We got there about half an hour early. The show was supposed to start at 7, and we didn’t know the line-up ahead of time, so it seemed like we got there at an appropriate time. I imagined that most of us would have gotten there around the same time, but that was not the case. We walked in and there were about 5 old dudes in there looking at us like we had come from another planet. Some old guy tried to joke with me about not letting “big guys” in, I joked back with him that I had moved recently and the memo must have gone to my old address. I got a laugh and then everything seemed to relax. I thought it was a little odd that we were the first of our group there. It was a little awkward because we were at the American Legion, and I know that some of these types of clubs are for members only, so I wasn’t sure if it was okay to be in there. I know the ASAP group that was putting on the show had told us that you didn’t need any type of affiliation to attend, but still, when we walked in, I wasn’t sure. Once we all laughed together, and the bartender asked what we wanted, it was easier to settle in. The representative from ASAP showed up about 10 minutes after we did. That’s when I was finally sure I was in the right place. However, no one seemed to know what was going on, so it got weird again.

     I’m not sure how the whole thing works, but I got the distinct feeling that no one did any kind of research about the location. It all worked itself out before show time, so it turned out to not be a big deal at all, but it sure started off sketchy. As we got closer to 7 the place really started filling up. I was surprised how many people were walking in. I have performed with the ASAP group several times before, and we never had that many people. The class I was in, there were only really 2 of us, although I believe the “books” would call it 3. I thought: “Maybe that’s why I didn’t get invited to perform at the graduation, they had too many people.” A woman named Caroline is the ASAP representative, and the one who teaches the classes. I was caught off guard by how many people were actually introducing themselves to her. I thought they would have all attended her class, but apparently that was not true. I became intrigued. A little after 7 we had a performer huddle. That’s when we go over the line-up, and talk about any last-minute concerns. It wasn’t until that moment that I realized who was actually performing. There were 8 of us. The place was pretty full. I wasn’t sure who all the people there were. But it was a good turnout. Way better than any of our other shows. It led me to wonder if these were regulars to the Legion, or if they were friends of the other performers. I didn’t know anyone there except for Caroline, my wife, and this lady named Anita who I had performed with before. I was excited. We got started a little late, I guess waiting to make sure everyone got there. It went pretty smooth. I was in the middle of the line-up. The 4 people before me didn’t get much response. It made me wonder if the people there were just regulars, and not really there for the comedy show.

      Although, as I looked around, they seemed way too young to be regulars at the American Legion. I don’t know if you’ve ever been to an American Legion, or a VFW, or any of these types of organizations, but they are usually old people. Quite old. And these were younger people who all seemed to know each other, including some of the performers. I felt like I kind of broke the tension. I wasn’t overwhelmed by the response I was getting, but I definitely felt like the room “opened up.” I don’t know if it was because none of them had seen me before, or if 5^th is a good spot, or if I did good, but the room became alive during my set. Everyone after me had a fairly decent response. My wife said she thought I was getting a great response, and that perhaps I just couldn’t hear it up on stage. I know I had people’s attention, and I know that the room felt different after I was done. And then people started getting drunk. It was a little annoying because people were on stage trying to perform, and people in the back were having loud drunk conversations. People kept turning and looking at them. There were a couple of people who “hushed” them, but if you’ve ever tried to get a drunk to “hush,” you probably know that it didn’t last very long. I felt bad for the performers, and was glad I had the spot I had. Some lady fell down, twice! Once was off of a bar-height stool. It was distracting. Why would you come to a comedy show and not allow the comedians to perform? Well, I guess technically she didn’t keep them from performing, but she wasn’t there to pay attention. And I think it’s rude to come to a performance and then talk through the whole thing. Well, technically not the whole thing, but still, not attentive. That’s not really “supportive.” Overall it was fun, but an hour and a half in the car, and a $70 bill? I’m not sure it’s worth it.